“Do Unto Others – Kindness” – United Presbyterian Church

By Rev. Melissa Krabbe

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Did you notice that the first verse of our scripture reading today is the Golden Rule? Jesus says to do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

I take the Golden Rule very seriously…which is why when I am buying gifts for my family and friends, I buy books. I love books. Doesn’t everybody love books?

By the way, whoever belongs to the bookcase in this picture definitely needs more books. Look at all those empty spaces just waiting for books!

Ilove it when people buy me books.

So, I buy people books. Because that’s what I would have them do unto me.

Right? Doesn’t that work? Why not? Not everyone is the same. Right.

The verses that lead up to the Golden Rule verse are especially challenging:

²⁷“But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. ²⁸Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. ²⁹If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. ³⁰Give to anyone who asks; and when things are taken away from you, don’t try to get them back.

Jesus starts with a caveat, “but to you who are willing to listen…” Not everyone can.

Do these verses mean you’re supposed to let people take advantage of you? Or hurt you? No!

One of the things I worked on during my sabbatical was learning how to be kind to myself. It’s a balance.

The point of these verses and the Golden Rule is to treat people with kindness. That’s our focus for today. Jesus puts in like this in verse 35:

“…love your enemies, do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return.”

We may already know that kindness can be tricky. Raise your hand if you think the following scenario is an example of being KIND:

Sitting with someone new at lunch KIND
Talking about someone behind their back NOT KIND
Listening to others talk about someone behind their back NOT KIND
- This one could be difficult for students, but even if they’re listening and not participating it isn’t kind to listen to gossip, even if you aren’t participating.,
Telling someone something negative that someone else said about them NOT KIND
- This is another tricky one. We always want to be truthful, but is bringing up something they said helpful, or does it create drama? Challenge students to think about standing up for their friends, instead of spreading hurtful or harmful words.
Helping someone with their homework KIND
Leaving someone out of the group text, on purpose UNKIND[1]

Kindness may be even harder when we’re in the final weeks of election season. Political campaigns are pushing hard to get us to hear their perspectives on the issues. We probably don’t all agree about those issues. But we don’t have to agree to do what Jesus teaches us to do.

Jesus calls us to love people, and to be kind to people.

We’ve seen this in action this past week. Republican Liz Cheney, the former Senator from Wyoming spoke at a campaign rally for Democrat Kamala Harris. Harris and Cheney acknowledged that they didn’t agree about all the issues, but they agree on the importance of democracy, and the need to defend our constitution.

There was a similar commitment to work together for the good of the country between President Ronald Reagan, a republican, and then Speaker of the House Tip O’Neill, a democrat. They were in opposition over plenty of issues, but at the end of the day they were still friends.

In the book Tip and the Gipper, writer Chris Matthews tells about their deep respect for one another that was especially visible in tough situations. After Reagan was shot, O’Neill was one of the first to visit him in the hospital.

He walked over to the bed and grasped both the president’s hands, and said, ‘God bless you, Mr. President.’ The president still seemed groggy…with lots of tubes and needles running in and out of his body. But when he saw Tip, he lit up and gave the speaker a big smile, and said, ‘Thanks for coming, Tip.’ Then, still holding one of the president’s hands, the speaker got down on his knees and said he would like to offer a prayer for the president, choosing the 23rd Psalm.” Then O’Neill kissed Reagan on the forehead.[2]

Years later, when a dinner was being held in Tip O’Neill’s honor, President Reagan was invited to speak. As he teased O’Neill about their political rivalry, they both had big smiles on their faces, and it was obvious that there was much more to their relationship than politics.

I especially love their example because they didn’t stay friends by avoiding discussions about challenging issues. They had to talk about them to do their jobs. They didn’t have to wonder whether or not they agreed about something. They knew because they’d talked about it.

Our ability to elect officials is a hallmark of American democracy, something that could be a source of joy and gratitude. But according to a Pew Research Center study conducted last year, only 10% of Americans say they are often or always hopeful when they think of politics.[3]

The parties and candidates bombard us with negativity and focus on our differences, but even on issues about which we disagree, the disagreement is not as great as it sometimes feels.

Consider guns. According to a 2022 Ipsos/NPR poll of gun owners, eight in ten gun owners favor universal background checks.[4] That’s a majority of Republican and Democratic gun owners.
On abortion, the Pew Research Center found that a supermajority 65% of moderate Republicans and a supermajority of moderate Democrats supported legal access to abortion.[5]
Regarding same-sex marriage, a 2022 Gallup Poll found that a majority of both Republicans and Democrats favored legal same-sex marriage.
Both Democrats and Republicans see immigration as an issue to be addressed in America. 81% of all Americans think children brought to America illegally, if they meet certain requirements, should have a chance at citizenship.[6]

Many Americans of both parties find themselves somewhere in the middle on the issues, and sharing much in common. We could probably agree that no one party has all the right answers and that we’re better off when we can work together.

[7]

Jesus shows us how to connect with people who might be our enemies when he meets the Samaritan woman at the well. He doesn’t avoid talking to her, even though Jews considered Samaritans to be enemies. And he doesn’t avoid talking about her reality. He tells her that he knows that she’s had five husbands and the man she is currently living with is not her husband. But he doesn’t attack her over this. He engages her with respect and asks her for help getting water from the well.

Sometimes when this story is read aloud, the reader will inject a scornful tone of voice into Jesus’ words, but there’s no reason to think Jesus is being unkind. It’s his kindness that overwhelms her and inspires her to bring all her friends to meet Jesus. He demonstrates what he’s been teaching – love one another. Love your enemies.

In the verse that follows the passage Marilyn read for us, Jesus says,

“Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven.” (Luke 6:37)

There’s some serious reciprocity in those verses. The way we judge others is the way we ourselves will be judged. If we condemn others, there will be backlash. Our own forgiveness is impacted by our willingness to forgive others. These are all ways we can do for others what we would like them to do for us.

You may have heard about the great Jewish sage Hillel who lived two thousand years ago. It’s said that a man came to ask him to teach him all of the Torah (the Jewish body of law) while standing on one foot (meaning, in an instant). Hillel said, “Whatever is hateful to yourself, do not do to others. All the rest is commentary.”[8]

It’s about reciprocity again. What would you not want someone to do to you?

Something that we easily slip into without meaning to is gossip, even though we wouldn’t want people to gossip about us. Psalm 41 laments:

They visit me as if they were my friends, but all the while they gather gossip,
and when they leave, they spread it everywhere. Psalm 41:6

Any time we’re talking about someone who is not present, we need to check ourselves. What would we want done if it were us?

The idea of treating people with kindness is not a new idea, though it is a timely one.

In Galveston Texas there’s a lady who goes around dressed like a bee to remind people to bee kind. She also hosts kindness art projects at one of the Galveston art studios, and inspired this kindness mural in downtown Galveston.

Here in Rice County there’s a kindness revolution that’s sponsored by Tory and Sonya Tipp through their State Farm Insurance agency. Periodically they give out kindness awards to people and businesses in Rice County who have been kind.

There are lots of ways to be kind. We’ve got a list for you today of some ideas. And another handout to help do some self-assessment about how well we’re treating other people with dignity and respect.

I mentioned earlier that our Methodist neighbors are also talking about this kindness campaign today. It’s a great opportunity to encourage one another.

I love that some are calling it a kindness revolution. Not a revolt, but a revolving. We revolve around Jesus who is at the center. As our lives revolve around the light of Christ, we reflect Jesus’ love and kindness in our thoughts, words, and actions. Jesus tells us in Matthew 25 that whatever we do to other people we are also doing to him.

Even if just on that basis alone, let’s always be kind!

[1] Resurrection Church, Kansas City, Campaign for Kindness https://campaignforkindness.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/10/2024-Do-Unto-Others-Student-Curriculum.pdf

[2] https://www.bc.edu/bc-web/centers/church21/publications/c21-resources/c21-resources-articles/Ronald-Reagan-and-Tip-O-Neill–A-Real-life-Friendship.html

[3] Adam Hamilton, Sermon 10/6/24, https://www.pewresearch.org/politics/2023/09/19/americans-dismal-views-of-the-nations-politics/

[4] https://www.ipsos.com/en-us/news-polls/npr-gun-owners-2022

[5] https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/fact-sheet/public-opinion-on-abortion/

[6] https://news.gallup.com/poll/647123/sharply-americans-curb-immigration.aspx

[7] https://stjameschurchtiverton.org.uk/imaginative-contemplation-john-45-42-the-living-water/

[8] Izzy Kalman, PhD. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/resilience-bullying/201105/principle-number-three-the-golden-rule#:~:text=This%20is%20how%20the%20Golden,feel%20like%20being%20mean%20back.